EP 38. Sex Tips for a Healthy Sex Life Within Your Marriage Cont. From The Lovers Dozen Series PT 20:

Foreign.

Welcome to the Married and Love it podcast.

We are Greg and Linda Smith, your host from Raleigh, North Carolina.

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Hey, thanks for Jo joining us today for your weekly dose of Married and Love It.

So today we're on episode 38 and we're going to be covering additional tips for a healthy sex life within your marriage.

Now, I know we probably have some first time listeners, so let me just tell you, this series that we're working on consists of 13 principles that we, Greg and I have applied that helped us bring restoration and healing to our marriage back in 98.

1986.

Wow.

Yeah.

And wow.

We're approaching almost 48 years of marriage.

Well, we will be on 48 years of marriage.

Lovers dear.

We're young lovers.

That's right, because I robbed a cradle.

You.

You did Married your first year out of high school, basically.

Yeah, just about.

And we're still applying these principles and you know what, they work.

But we ourselves, we have to be intentional and apply them on purpose.

So the Lovers Dozen series began back on episode 19.

So let me encourage you to go back and listen to them.

If you haven't heard them already and if you have heard them, do a little refresher course.

Okay?

So the.

Also I want to just mention this as a disclaimer.

These episodes might not be good or appropriate for younger ears.

So just be conscientious of that mom and dad and pay attention to who the audience might be because some of this information, no telling what could come out.

And it might curl your toes.

We don't want it to curl your kiddo's toes.

Or you know what?

You know what?

It might, if it did, it might raise that.

Birds and the bees.

It might raise that like mom, what's that mean?

Yeah, really, you may not want to answer those questions.

Yeah, so just Be ready.

When we're doing these topics on sex, anything can be brought out.

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So today we're going to continue on about sex and healthy sex tips.

We actually started the first part of this off calling it sex sizzle or fizzle.

So hopefully all of our tips that we're sharing are keeping the fizzle out of your marriage and keeping it sizzling regarding your sex Life.

So number six of the 11 that we're going to have all together is you're a gift to each other.

You as a husband and wife, God created you to be a gift to each other.

And so you got to have that mentality, your gift, your husband is a gift, your wife is a gift, but you're a gift to them also.

Now in First Corinthians 7, verse 3, it says, Let the husband fulfill his duty to his wife and likewise the wife to her husband.

And then it goes on and talks about each one having authority over their bodies.

Don't deprive one another.

So, but I'm not going to focus on all that.

We want to talk about being a gift because depending on how you see yourself and your sex life, it can be a duty or it could be a chore, it could be a bore, or else it's fun.

It's a, it's a, it's a desire, something you're taking joy in.

But the devil comes in and tries to steal, kill and destroy your sex life and that's not God's plan.

And that's not what we're going to talk about tonight.

We're going to talk about how you can have a Sizzle.

Can you say that, Linda, with me?

Sizzle, Sizzle, Sizzle.

Yes, that's what we want it to be.

Sizzle.

Oh, we need to put this program on pause for a minute.

So sex is a privilege, but it's also responsibility, because that's what Second First Corinthians 7 is talking about.

It says you're a gift to one another, but not that deprive, but to meet their needs.

So it's a privilege because God says you can have sex.

He wants you to have sex.

You got the ring that says you can or the band that says you can.

But it's a responsibility.

You've got to know how to handle your gift because you are called to serve each other by satisfying each other's sexual desires.

But that should not be meant for you to have an attitude that it's a duty or I got to do this.

Okay.

Now, when you got married, you said your vows.

Think about that.

Now we have to think.

Me and Linda have to think 48 years ago.

Good thing we got a recording and some pictures.

Yeah.

I have to get the little book.

When you officiate weddings.

Yeah.

And read the vows.

Yeah.

But you know, sadly.

So a lot of people aren't saying their vows to each other.

They're just writing their feel good statements.

Yeah, yeah.

Instead of committing.

That's right.

Because your vows are a commitment.

They are a commitment.

And that's why God put them in the Bible.

Yeah.

It's a commitment to love.

Yes.

To love through sickness and health and so forth.

Yes.

Okay.

But when you said your vows to each other in the sexual realm, you commit it.

When I held Linda's hand, I looked at her and I said, I'm going to be emotionally committed to you relationally and sexually.

That means I'm going to be available.

That means we are reasonably held accountable to.

To fulfill our spouse's sexual needs.

And that's what God's called us to do.

I said reasonably because God's sex is not sex on demand.

We're going to talk about that more in a few minutes.

So all of this having the proper attitude creates for a more successful marriage.

Now, Linda, let's go ahead and talk about sex on demand.

Well, when a husband demands his wife to do, quote, unquote, hard duty.

And see, usually it's.

I don't hear that many stories about the wife says, have sex now, and she has to force the husband.

It's almost like the husband are saying, hey, woman, you know, her duty.

And if he does that without loving Her.

She can start to feel really cheap.

Yes.

Like a prostitute, you know, or she might feel used and abused or, you know, develop resentment towards all of that and even lose a desire for sex altogether.

And she.

She might not be able to function even sexually.

Right.

And of course, we know that that's not gonna cause any kind of enjoyment.

And if anything, I know it could be.

Cause her to be rebellious toward the whole thing.

Oh, yeah.

You know, Wouldn't you say?

Yeah, yeah.

And then when.

When it comes time to make love, chances are she's just going to be laying there.

She's got a negative attitude to begin.

With and with like a limp rag.

Unless a man is an animal, most men really don't want to have their wife just laying there.

Or of course, it can be the other way around, too, but that's not the way it usually is.

They want to have.

They want to be having fun like we've talked about.

All right, all right, all right.

So what we want to do is look at some scriptures on how we can walk out the First Corinthians 7:3 about being a gift to each other.

First Corinthians 7:33 and 34 talk about how a husband and wife's goal is to please their spouse.

So they're not looking at, how can I deny my spouse?

How can I avoid my spouse?

They shouldn't be, but they want to see how they can.

Please see, that's an attitude of, I don't have to make love to my spouse.

I don't have to do things that make my spouse happy, but I get to.

It's a privilege, it's an honor, and God has put that upon you.

But unfortunately, life comes in.

The marriage busters come in, the sex fizzlers come in.

And it causes our attitude to drift, to get off course to where love making is everything but what God's called it to be.

So we're going to talk about more about how we can handle that.

Now, First Corinthians 7:3 requires us in order for that scripture about being a gift to one another, we need to operate in love.

Because what happens is we can take a scripture out of the Bible and not apply the surrounding scriptures to it.

And then we can make it black and white like this one talks about.

Don't deprive one another.

It's your duty.

Well, we have to take that in light of what the Bible says about love.

And that's what we're going to do, is take a couple of minutes and to see how this scripture Works out to where people aren't feeling used and abused or deprived.

All right, so let's look at.

Yes, let's look at this 1st Corinthians 13, verses 4 through 5.

Is the love scripture.

All right?

It says, love is patient.

Love is kind and not jealous.

Love does not brag, and it's not arrogant.

It does not act unbecomingly.

It doesn't seek its own it.

It's not provoked.

It doesn't take into a wrong account.

Suffer.

Now, a couple of key words.

Love is patient.

We need to be patient in the area of love and our lovemaking.

Whether it's patient on getting what we want or feeling like we got to be a servant or something.

Love is patient.

It gives each other room to grow.

Love is kind.

You've got to be kind.

In this.

A big part, though, it says it doesn't act unbecomingly.

Now, a lot of times I'll hear this about men.

More like, usually it's the men that if for some reason they think tonight's tonight and it don't work, they'll walk around pouting.

Some people call it the man pout, but they go around like a little kid.

I didn't get what I want.

I'm not going to talk to you.

I'm going to not help you out because they didn't get what they want.

But that's not love.

Love is patient.

If for some reason your spouse isn't able to meet your needs that night, or they're busy or something's going on, you know what?

You have patience with them.

How can we work this out now?

Let's move on.

Philippians 2, verses 2 through 4.

And we can look at this as demanding sex or denying sex, but listen to the attitude.

Do nothing from selfishness, but instead regard one another as more important than himself.

Linda's needs and meeting her needs are more than important to my needs.

So if I. I go, I need sex tonight.

I want sex.

I'm horny tonight.

I'm ready to go.

I whatever.

And I go, linda, I want sex.

But she's not able to do it because she's recovering from surgery or she just worn out.

She's dealing with issues going on her body.

We've had a rough day.

Love says, lord, I'm going to put Linda first.

I don't get selfish with that.

She's more important than me.

Do not merely look out for your own personal interest, but also for the interest of others.

It's not.

It's not about me, me, me, Me, me, me, me, me.

It's what my spouse needs.

Now see, here's the key.

If we both, husband and wife are constantly looking out for the other.

You ever go to a door and you go to open the door for the person at the same time and they're gonna, they go, and you open the door and you say you go first.

They go, no, you go first.

No, you go first.

No, you go first.

And finally you both go and you both run into each other.

But what that is saying is just like when it comes down to sex, you're helping each other.

You're saying, what do you need?

What would you like?

And as you begin to serve each other, everybody's needs are getting met.

So if one night you're not getting your need met the way you would like, you know what, you know, the next night or two, you're going to get your need met.

Why?

Because you're both mature and you're walking in love and you're preferring one another.

And that's the way that scripture works.

So you're never depriving one another.

You're fulfilling a responsibility that God gave you, but you're not depriving and you're not being, not being taken advantage of.

And a scripture that sums this up, I love.

It's my favorite scripture on love.

First Colossians 3:14 says, Put on love.

It mentions all these other things to do, but then it says above all those things, put on love.

So when it comes to sex, you got to say, what am I going to put on?

Selfishness.

It's like putting on a coat or taking a coat off.

I take off selfishness and then I put on love.

And that allows me to love Linda.

Or she can love me or you love your spouse because you're, you're making a decision.

See, love says in relation to that first Corinthians 7 and the other love scripture says, love says, I see a need.

I see your need.

I'll take care of it tonight even if I'm tired.

That's love, because I'm tired tonight.

But you know what?

I'm going to go ahead and do this.

However, love also says from the other person, I have a need.

But I see you're tired.

I see you worked your job the day too, and you took care of the kids.

I see a need that you have.

I see I might need, but I see you can't meet it.

You know what?

Go ahead and get some rest tonight.

You see that?

See, it's a two way street.

But if Both you and a husband and wife are working like that.

Eventually everybody's needs are getting taken care of and nobody is feeling like they're getting taken advantage of.

Love finds a way to meet the needs.

Also, you can offer alternatives.

Say, hey, I'm tired tonight.

And we talked about this in the last episode.

You can offer the lazy love.

You can listen to that episode and it's going to talk about lazy love, other ways to meet your spouse's needs sexually without going through a full blown making love session.

And it can be very fun.

So love finds a way to meet your spouse's needs and for you guys to work it out so you're both happy and enjoying the gift God gave you.

That's right.

And here's a, here's a thought for you ladies.

While you're meeting your husband's sexual needs, your desire may not be there, but once the love making process starts, then your arousal can happen, which then can kick in your desire.

So think about that because it could open the door for a really great time.

Right?

Right.

So let's talk about number seven.

So when you're, you know, you're going to get aroused, we make time for lovemaking.

Yep, there you go.

Number seven, make time for lovemaking.

Now, it could be a set time, right.

That you've established on your calendar, a sex day that you put on your calendar.

Or it could be spontaneous, or it could be, tonight's the night.

It could be a goal that you might have established for you and your spouse and your marriage.

Okay?

But if you're not doing this, if you're not making time for lovemaking, a lot of people say, well, you know what, that just ruins the whole thing.

Yeah.

You know, that kind of put the damper on, you know, all of that.

Well, if you don't like it, let me just ask you this.

How's that working for you?

Yeah.

If you're not setting a time because you're so busy and you don't make a date, are you making love as much as you want to?

Then maybe you know when you set a sex date or you say, all right, Monday night at 9 o' clock, we're gonna make love.

What?

Whatever the time is.

Right.

Think about the anticipation.

You're looking forward to it.

Yes.

You built up to it.

Don't wait till 10 o' clock and then you decide to put the romance on.

Put the romance on.

All matter of fact, maybe all week long.

It could be, it's set down, built up to it.

Yeah.

Make it sex.

That you want that is like almost.

The foreplay to the foreplay.

Yeah.

Send a text and say T minus 2 hours and 3 minutes.

I can't wait to see you tonight.

Okay, so make time for lovemaking.

You know, go to bed early.

Huh?

That's.

That's a.

What?

What.

How does that happen?

Yeah, wake up early.

Yeah, wake up early.

There you go.

Set your alarm just a little bit earlier than you normally would.

You know, set that time.

Make that time for lovemaking.

And also as a couple, you should be deciding what priority sex plays in your marriage.

Yes.

You know, you can agree together on everything from quickies to that sizzling encounter.

That's very good because, you know, like I just said earlier, you're a gift to each other.

Well, don't get so busy you can't enjoy your gift.

Yeah, that's a bummer.

On the counter waiting to be.

You're looking out of the box.

Oh, I'd like to do that.

I'd like.

Well, make time for.

Even if you've got a lot of kids, there's ways to do that.

Okay, that brings us to the next thing by.

Yes.

Being creative.

Be creative.

Yes.

Take it same.

Okay, we're talking about be creative.

Same time, number eight.

Yes.

Same time, same place, same way.

Makes for boring love making.

Yes.

Let's get creative.

So let's get creative.

Now one thing just talking about atmosphere a little bit is.

And your.

If your bedroom's your main place, get creative.

Get some special lighting.

I know there's times when people say, I don't want anybody to see me naked.

Well, we need to.

I have to mention here, Brett, the red light bulb.

Oh yeah, go ahead.

I mean, women.

Hey, you put in red light bulbs where there wouldn't be just the normal white ones.

And I'm telling you what, it sets an atmosphere.

Oh, yes.

Why do they call it the red light district?

Because they're making people.

And that's not what.

We don't want to be that to our husbands.

But we do want to create proper environment.

And I'll tell you, it's.

It's medically sped proven that the red light bulb hides up, blemishes, wrinkles, the whole bit.

Cellulite, Cellulite, you name it.

Women.

So go get you some red light bulbs.

Light app.

Create an atmosphere of red light bulbs.

Even if you got a salt lamp.

Some nice.

Yeah, some special lighting.

Christmas lights up on.

Or white lights around Christmas in July, candles.

I mean, you know these things.

But you know what?

You have to do them.

Think about it.

Music.

Have them type of music you guys like playing in the background.

Could be.

Could be praise.

Some people like to make love to praise music.

That's not my thing.

I like love songs or jazz or easy listening.

Right.

Yeah.

You know, but make sure that your bedroom does not look like a laundry room.

Oh.

Oh, my gosh.

You know, towels all over the place or clothing that needs it.

Make it a romance room.

Yes, that's your R R. Romance room.

Yes.

Right.

Yes.

So, okay, what about.

So anyway, even get a noise machine, because that can help block noises from other places, but also can block noise going out if you've got kids or other people in the house.

So create an atmosphere to make sure.

And make sure your.

Your bedroom, like Linda said, doesn't look like a laundry room or a junk room.

I've seen rooms like that, and it's like that does not create any type of atmosphere.

Now where basically make love anywhere you want as long as nobody else is around and it's safe and people aren't gonna find you doing it.

That's the bottom.

Somebody do a talk a while back on about making love outside or go parking in your car.

Well, they said that's fine, but you just don't want to have it where people can see you.

I mean, I have to say, me and Linda's had adventures and making love in the car.

But you know what?

Depending on where you are outside nowadays, now, we've been married, camera everywhere.

We've been married 48 years.

All right, so they didn't have cameras all over the place and people flying around their little drones in the air.

So it was a little more adventurous.

It was more so.

You do have to watch out for cameras.

But you know what?

Go in your backyard, go parking in your car, have a nice place, or park in your garage.

Just don't leave the car running with the door shut, you know, anywhere else.

Find different rooms.

I know some of y' all know this, but when was the last time you did it?

When was the last time you ventured out?

You know, when the kids are grown, you know, when the kids aren't around or you don't have kids, you can do a little more.

But tell you what, go parking.

Maybe you know somebody that's got a lot that's out in the woods somewhere, you know, you can go and park out there.

You know, get.

You're an adult.

You got the ring that says you can get creative.

Some of y' all need to get out of your comfort zone and just have a little Bit of fun, especially if you got SUV or minivan.

Yeah, sky's the limit, so to speak.

Volkswagen days, the hippie days, right?

Yeah.

If it's rocking, don't bother knocking.

So, hey, Song of Solomon.

They went outside.

Yeah, they did.

All right, so the here's a big question.

What can we do?

Well, number one, you want to make love and bring pleasure to your spouse.

So you need to become.

We talked about this last week.

But become an expert on your spouse's body, and then you'll know what to do and how to do it.

But here's a big question people ask all the time.

What can we do sexually that is, quote, legal according to the Bible?

You know, if you're not a Christian and you're not into the Bible, then you really don't have any boundaries other than moral convictions.

But the Bible does give us Christians a guideline to follow.

So what's legal?

And basically sex between you as a husband and wife is legal.

You don't do animals.

You don't bring in a third party, whether they're actual third party, like a threesome or more or that's.

That's in live or if it's through a video or something like that.

Just you and your spouse.

Basically, anything you want to do that's not painful and against somebody's will, you can enjoy together as long as it's not physically or mentally damaging.

You know, a lot of people say, well, what about this?

What about that?

Look at it in that light.

You know, somebody will ask about sex toys.

Well, you know, what?

If you want to use sex toys, there's nothing in the Bible that says you can't use sex toys.

All right?

But on anything you decide you want to do, you as a husband and wife need to come to agreement on it, talk about it, and see what you want to do or experiment.

A lot of times it's good to.

Just experiment, basically discuss with your spouse what, what you may be interested.

Be open minded and remember that your opinion doesn't make it right or wrong.

It's just an opinion, you know, so don't condemn each other or, you know, shame or anything like that.

It's important to have a discussion with each other if you're interested in broadening your horizons, so to speak.

Right.

Like you said, be willing to venture out of your comfort zone and try new things, but don't pressure your spouse to do something that they don't want to do.

You know, give it some time.

And, you know, here's a, here's an Idea.

Make a yes list, a no list.

You know, something that is non negotiable or a maybe list.

Yeah.

You know, I think that's a great thing to do and matter of fact that's going to be our homework for this episode is to do that.

Yeah.

Make those lists and you know, do it on your own and.

Or do it together.

But if you're not comfortable in doing it together, well then set that list on the side and at the right time then find out when might be a good time to talk about it.

Okay, so different things.

Different things.

What can you do?

You know what?

Different positions.

Yes.

Try a different.

Don't be a missionary all the time.

I was gonna say.

All right, you ministry minded people, don't be so missionary minded, you know.

Yeah, really, you know, do a different position.

It's, you know, give yourself permission.

It's okay.

Now we did talk in other episodes about you know, things that hinder us.

So go back, listen to that.

You know, like what you've been brought up into and all that.

But it's up to you, you and your spouse, what you do with your sex life and what you.

What boundaries you want to set.

So do that.

Yeah, talk about it, pray about it.

And we're probably going to do another episode down the road where we get more into what's legal because there's more specific things people ask basically again whatever you two decide less longs doesn't cause you pain or go against psychological or it's going to mess with you.

It's pretty well okay.

But we're going to talk about that more in another episode but right.

Just explore and such.

Remember same time, same place, the same way can make first for boring love making.

Have some fun active act like a young person.

Get get.

Got the band that says you can run around the house naked when the kids aren't home.

Whatever put a blindfold on in whatever room you end up do it there.

Yeah.

You know, but have fun.

Have fun.

So that brings us to the next thing.

Oh, appearance.

Appearance number nine.

Appearance.

Imagine.

Okay, well you want to groom for the occasion.

Groom for the occasion.

Imagine.

You guys have picked the time you decided we're gonna do it tonight at 9 o'.

Clock.

So you've talked about what you're gonna do.

The man knows the signal is set.

Tonight's the night.

The wife has everything ready because she's kind of planned the event.

She's all showered, the room is perfect.

She's looking good and smells good.

The husband, he's been waiting Anticipating, I guess you could call that he's watching TV or playing video games.

He hears the call, come and get it.

He comes into the room, there's his wife waiting for her.

The red lights are simmering, the candles going.

He comes in wearing a dirty T shirt.

His hair's all messed up.

He didn't take a bath, he's a little sweaty.

He didn't brush his teeth and he's got onion breath and he didn't shave.

Now can his wife say, this is being swept off your feet by your hero.

What kind of turn on is this?

Your grooming is vital for both of you.

Yes, men, your fingernails, if you have time.

And you can shave again when you know something's going on.

Now maybe you don't need to shave because of the way your beard is, but have a bath if you can.

Groom, look well, you don't want to if you're naked, you're not going to be putting on clothes to look nice.

But you know what I mean.

Take care of your body in that regards and have good hygiene because you don't want to be now.

And the ladies, shave your legs.

All right, there's things you can do, lady.

Things you can do to smell good, look good and feel good for your spouse.

All right, so.

So it goes both ways.

Grooming for both.

Both of them.

Yeah.

I'm gonna throw one in here too.

Would be your private areas.

Men can shave around their private areas and make that a more pleasurable area when there, it's been groomed.

Let's put it.

They call it man grooving or whatever, something like that, because they make razors for that.

But ladies, same thing.

Just look at your overall body and see what can you do to make this the best possible experience.

Now if you happen to be going down the hallway and you bump into each other and maybe you've been doing chores and all of a sudden you give each other that 10 second kiss and all of a sudden it's like, now is the time.

Don't worry about being all bathed because you're going to have times when you're, you have sex and you're just kind of cruddy, but that's part of the passion that comes out.

That's allowed for quickie.

Yeah, if you're going to have a.

Quickie, you have a quickie.

Yep, that's allowed.

So let's move on.

Well, okay.

Number 10.

Recognize the Fizzlers or the distractions I guess is what you could call them.

Recognize those distractions that are hindering your sex life.

And I'm just going to name off a few of them.

It could be a ringing cell phone.

Oh, yes, the cell phone.

Away.

You know, put all of that away.

Take your watch off, you know, because if you get dinged on your watch or whatever, then that's gonna distract you.

And for women, it doesn't take much to distract because we're all spaghetti noodles all in our brain anyways.

Anyways.

I mean, even for a man that's in his waffle box, his sex box, you know.

Yeah.

It can be a total distraction.

And the kids, they're gonna be a distraction if they're in the next room.

Well, make sure that everybody's settled and okay.

Or they're down for the night, you know, so make sure when you go to set your time for lovemaking.

Lovemaking.

That.

That's a time when the kids are in bed, are all settled for the.

The time being.

And some other fizzlers are that if you're tired, fatigue is all the way to physical limitations.

If you're tired, oh, forget it.

That is going to be a fizzler or a distraction.

So be recognize this.

Be aware of it.

Okay?

So ask yourself, what can I do to overcome these type of situations?

Well, like I said, put all the devices away.

Now, one exception for that would be if you got sex toys and everybody's agreed on it, like Greg said, you know, so put those devices away and plan a sleepover for the kids.

So then you have the whole place to yourself without children anywhere.

And like I said on number seven, work on your overall schedule.

Yes.

You know, because if you don't, then it's going to get bypassed.

I would say on that one, you can go back to the episode that was called Crazy Busy.

Yeah.

Because if you're so busy in your life, it's crowding out everything, maybe you need to do some hardcore work and.

Set the priority of how sex fits into your marriage.

Right.

Yeah.

That's in your whole life.

And we do have the fizzlers that are listed out on.

We'll put them in our show notes.

Put them on this one again.

Yeah, yeah.

Because we had them on one of them in the past.

So.

Yeah.

What's our next tip number 11.

We're going to stop with this one.

Allow time for you and your spouse to learn and grow through these.

All 11 tips since episode 39.

No, 34.

34.

Departs on sex from the lovers dozens.

There you go.

We've covered a lot of areas.

There could be problems.

There could have been past abuse.

There could have been predetermined attitudes before you got married.

Or maybe you've been married for 30 or 40 years and you've got these deep ingrained habits and you're saying, you know what?

We're not where we need to be in our sex life.

We need to make some improvement.

Allow time for you and your spouse to grow.

Just like we said earlier in First Corinthians 13.

There you go.

Love is patience.

Love is kind.

Be patient with your spouse as they're learning.

You know, they may learn, maybe it's in technique.

They may get it right the first time, but the second time you go, you're not rubbing right.

We know what they're learning.

They're learning.

So have patience.

Be kind, expect and believe the best of each other.

That's part of love.

And look at how you can please your spouse and do excel still more and get rid of those fizzlers so you can experience the gift that God gave you where you're exhilarated with your spouse's love.

You're wandering up and down their bodies and have an extreme pleasures and blessings.

And yes, you know, maybe this time it's not.

But you know what?

You know, the next time is going to be the biggie.

So put your faith out there and say, you know what?

God says we can have this.

We're going to have healing in our sex life.

We're going to learn and we're going to grow and we're going to curl some toes.

There you go.

And let me just say in closing, let go and let the tiger in you out.

All right, let's go.

Let's go.

All right.

A few couple little honeydews I mentioned earlier.

Make that list the yes list, the no list, and the maybe list.

Okay.

And another one is what?

Think about this and put it to practice.

What's one thing you can do to be creative the next time that you make love?

Something new and different?

Do that.

And then what's the third one, dear?

Oh, it's the ten second kiss.

So.

And that never gets boring?

That never gets boring.

Never.

Never.

So do the ten second kiss again.

Grab your.

Your gift.

Give them a good gift back with a good wet kiss for 10 seconds or longer.

Maybe something spontaneous may happen, but do it.

Sometimes those kisses are just little pecks and you're going, oh, that was good.

But you know what?

It sets a mood and it sets an attitude for the day.

You sent a message that I took time to.

To.

To love on or kiss my spouse and you go about your business.

But sometimes it can be more than that and really set the attitude in the mood.

So give the 10 second kiss.

Hey, I want to add this.

So say you're walking down the hallway in your house and you're crossing each other's path.

Put your arm up in the air and say it's going to cost you.

Oh, to get past.

It's a toll.

It's a toll.

Pay and do grab them women.

Grab that man by the collar and you pull him to you and you just put your lips on his and just love on him for 10 seconds.

You know, that's a good point because when I think we did, you say let the tiger out.

Yes.

All right, that's a good point.

Because sometimes our personality types are holding us back.

No, that's true.

You know, and get free.

Do something you haven't done.

Shock your spouse.

Maybe, maybe you're the one that needs to lay them down on the chair or the couch sexually.

I mean, just say rock is rock each other's world.

You know what I mean?

And maybe they're laying back like what in the world just happened?

Bring it on again.

That's what it's all about.

That's it.

All right.

All right, you guys, thanks watching for for joining us.

I hope you've gotten sexually inspired today.

I know I have.

All right, hurry up.

As you sit down and do the honeydews together.

Or if you have any kind of discussion with each other, we'll grab a cup of coffee or some tea and you can have a Married and Love it coffee mug to put it in.

Check out our merchandise on our website.

The link will be below and we look forward to you joining us next week.

So we'll see you then.

And remember this always, you can be married and love it on purpose.

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